28 May 2009

Caption needed: Party pants

By: Jessica B.

This is a perfect example of why I always keep a camera in my purse. 

It’s so good that you have to photograph it.
While I was at home last weekend, we stopped by a “high end” Goodwill store, that sells brand new or designer clothing donations. I think it’s a great idea so my stepmom (who is the shopping devil) and I went in to peek around.
And while I was digging through pants, I happen to come across this beauty. I immediately took out my camera and fluffed the legs so the detail could be caught perfectly. I didn’t want you all to miss a thing because it’s such good blog fodder!
After the photo session, I told my dad and stepmom I wanted to try them on (kiddingly). Dad got the joke and my stepmom didn’t. I think she looked actually horrified.
So rather than rack my brain for something clever to say, I thought I’d open it up to everyone!
Leave a comment with your wittiest caption or most appropriate place to wear this fine piece of fashion. I’ll even put together a little something to send the person with the best answer. If that’s not tempting, I don’t know what is!
Oh and does anyone want to go to a pants party? (name that movie!!)


  1. Do you know that this is correct time to receive the home loans, which can make you dreams real.

  2. wekeepsaying says:

    i know, i know, i'm a whole week late. blame my excessive jet-setting.

    "do you mean there's a party in your pants, and i'm invited?"
    "yep! yeah that's it!"
    "brick, did brian tell you to do this?"
    "no, i do not want to come to a party in your pants"
    "very well. ian! want to come to a party in my pants?"
    "no brick"

    haha, i love anchorman!

  3. EP says:

    Wow… Those are pretty fantastic.

  4. Vanessa says:

    “For when the dry cleaner is closed”

  5. Moonjava says:

    Hi! I just tagged you in a little meme that I made up! ;) Hope you play!

  6. Kristi says:

    These pants are the perfect solution to not carrying a purse to the club…wear them proudly anywhere and if you get a look simply say “don’t hate on the pants” and continue to shake your booty on the dance floor – which you will be able to do all night because these pants will look great until 4am no matter what you do…the wrinkles are built in!

  7. Lil' Woman says:

    Words cannot justify those pants :(

  8. Andhari says:

    I just wanna give that pants as a gift to someone and see how he or she reacts.

  9. Katelin says:

    hahaha these are awesome. you totally should have gotten them and rocked them in vegas next week :)

  10. Ronnica says:

    Perhaps they’d be useful skydiving…you have some place to put your keys AND their aerodynamic (sorta).

  11. sugarmeg says:

    awesome pants!


  12. Cheryl says:


    Which leaves me to say, those pants are as big of a fail as Sex Panther turned out to be.

  13. just me says:

    The perfect place to wear those pants: The Dump.

    Because you’ll need to throw them out immediately.

  14. Lily says:

    If God wore pants, I bet they would look exactly like those…

  15. apparently Simon VanKempen (from Real Housewives of NYC) dropped off his latest stash at your hometown Goodwill store.

  16. Miss Grace says:

    Let me guess. You actually bought them for yourself, so you’ll have something snazzy for BlogHer?

  17. Jenn says:

    wow those are all kinds of horrible. they look like some kind of new-age AC Slater pants.

    It’s taking Saved by the Bell into the 21st century :)

  18. Kyla Roma says:

    Sweet jebus, are those made out of industrial crepe paper? I love that someone spent money on these. I’m glad you guys didn’t!!

  19. Ray says:

    Sunday Brunch. With Lady Gaga. I would wear those pants to make up for her lack of pants.

  20. SoMi's Nilsa says:

    Moonjava stole my thoughts exactly. Getting ready for an MC Hammer concert, those are the pants I’d most definitely choose to wear!

  21. Deutlich says:

    those pants are amazing. five zippers?! you can store all your trinkets like a little hamster.

  22. Angela says:

    I’m thinking those are acceptable if you’re trying to be Edward Scissorhands for Halloween.

  23. Big&Green says:

    Those pants are missing from the prop department for the upcoming movie “The Hulk 3″. The can really expand!

  24. Rachel says:

    you know I’ll probably pepper your comment section with different captions but right now I can only think of;

    “Stop! Fashion crime!”

  25. Parachute pants (with zippers?)

  26. “Shit.. whick pocket did I put the condom in…???”

  27. Moonjava says:


    I’m thinking more along the lines of: “It’s Hammer Time!” ;)

  28. Do you remember that Missy Elliot video? Where she’s wearing the plastic bag outfit…? It was the video for Supa Dupa Fly…These pants look like they’re the bottom half of that deal!

  29. Wehideit says:

    “Guaranteed to hide celulite”

  30. Maki says:

    Ahem.. “Meet Victoria(Beckham) @ site 7.” – I don’t know, but that pants look like a failed version of VB. You can wear that hideous piece to a construction site with a helmet.

  31. Pam says:

    Those pants are HIDEOUS. Zippers, crazy gatherings and shiny fabric? Ew.

    Right now all I can think of is, “Zip it. Zip it real good.”
    But I’m going to keep thinking. I love a good caption challenge.

  32. Mandy says:

    I’ve got nothing, those are just so wrong.