That’s not really the line I got tonight when JohnBoy told me it was over, it was pretty much me.

Over? Was it ever really….on?

Whatever it was, last night, JohnBoy and I finally got to talk by phone after days of telephone tag and then came the inevitable part of the conversation, “so hey I wanted to talk to you for a minute.”

And over the following minutes, we were really honest.

I don’t see this going anywhere (him)

Why? (me)

Timing

Busy summer work schedules (me)

Lots of travel (him and me)

Miscommunication that lead to us not talking about little things, leading to resentment (him and me)

And then it was done.

I told him I hoped we could keep in touch and see where things are at when stuff calms down but said that was his move and that I thought something might be there between us but that timing just worked against us in the end.

He didn’t exactly say something, but it’s okay, I’m not unfamiliar to any of this.

Now that it’s done, I still feel a mix of emotions: sad, disappointed and relieved. But mostly right now, sad. I have no real reason to feel that way, but I do.

And to make it worse, I can’t help but feel like the pathetic version of me came out again on the phone, asking to keep in touch, feeling like I should have done more to clear up miscommunications.

So it’s back to square one. And after getting my a** kicked this week by guys and relationships, I think it need a week off. And maybe a hug.

And a night out with LOTS of drinks :)

I promise the melodramatic posts about relationships are done for now! Onward and upward!

So below is the post about my epically awful date on Saturday. Sorry about the wait, I just braindumped it out on Sunday morning and then had to take a break to edit it. And thus, we have the full story below.

Let’s start with the obvious: how did I end up on a bad date?

Well, things with JohnBoy are still a little in flux right now so rather than wait around, another Match guy asked me out and I said, why not? I mean, what do I have to lose?

Apparently, when I agreed to this date, I was also going to get in a time machine and go back to 2002 when I was in college and doing crazy sh*t.

Quick bio: This new guy “College Peter Pan” is my age, has a good job but travels a lot during the week for business. He’s a huge Michigan fan and Big 10 sports fan (me too, minus the Michigan fan part) and was funny and nice by email.

So we decide to meet a wine bar not too far from my house (convenient!) but just as I’m ready to leave to meet him, Peter Pan texts saying he needs to push back the date 30 minutes because he got home late from watching the Michigan game and needs to clean up. Okay. So I leave later and meet him at the new time, where he is 5-10 minutes late. Not super cool either (especially when you live within walking distance.)

But rather than be bitchy, we sit down and look at the menu. And then the drinking started. This guy could put away more Bacardi/diets than anyone I’ve seen since…well college. In the course of 90 minutes, he must have put away 6-7 of them while I was sipping champagne. I didn’t consider the drinking to be a race but apparently he did because he made multiple comments of me “nursing” drinks. Um we’re on a date, not at a frat party.

So after three drinks and no dinner, I’m pretty buzzed and while conversation was good, Peter Pan wants to go check out the college football scores. Unable to decide where we go next, he takes me to a dive bar not far from the wine bar, where I very easily don’t fit in attire-wise. It was fun, but it’s the place where 1990s Metallica blasts in the speakers and “woo girls” are all over the place and dry humping guys also wearing college football jerseys.

There I decide to move to beer because, well this isn’t the kind of place that has champagne or nice wine, and after catching up on his college football scores, Peter Pan goes to play pool. Oh and yeah it’s a DOUBLES game. Me, who has had 5 drinks and no dinner at this point has to play pool? I couldn’t even tell you the capital of Illinois at that moment. But I play two games of pool and do pretty well. And by the time be brings bar-made popcorn, it is the best tasting thing ever.

He kept feeding me drinks too, getting me more beers after I said I was good (why he was doing that will come out in a minute) and then when I said okay he said, “you’re not even paying for them so of course you’ll take advantage.” Nice.

Oh yes, the fight. While we were waiting to play pool, some drunk Ohio State fans come in and he gets fired up because Ohio State lost and he wants to rub it in. Which he does, and takes a heated taunting session into a full blown argument and one girl screaming “you’re an a**hole! I’ll kick your a**.” Even while playing pool he wouldn’t let it go. So after picking a fight with Ohio State fans, he says this winner:

“Have you ever had a [insert drink name I don't remember]?”

“No, what is it?”

“It’s really good, tastes like a milkshake but with liquor”

“What bar is that at?”

“Oh it’s not far from here, about 100 feet”

(scanning my memory of the neighborhood for what bar he’s referring to) “Duffy’s has it?”

“No”

(still thinking) “What bar then, I’m totally drawing a blank”

“Oh, nevermind, it’s not at a bar, can’t blame a guy for trying”

“Oh it’s at your apartment, and you were trying to lure me there by telling me it’s at a bar”

“I tried”

“Yeah, that’s not going to happen”

And once that conversation was over, I took a break in the bathroom where  a woman was laying on the floor almost passed out. So after checking on her and notifying the bouncer what was going on, I was ready to go.

But not before I mention my promotion in passing and he says “oh my god that makes me so hard down there.”

That was the moment I knew it was time to go.

So he walked me out to a cab, gave me a hug goodbye and pushed me in and walked back to the bar. No doubt looking to see if a group of girls who were wearing Michigan jerseys was still there, possibly for some dry humping.

And I was TOTALLY fine with that.

I need to screen these guys better. And maybe it’s time to take a mini break from dating.

So….thoughts?

Review blog update: Oh and because my lips weren’t doing any making out this weekend, I posted a review of a new MAC lip gloss I’m loving right now