09 November 2009

Secret supermodel dream FAIL

By: Jessica B.
Tagged: Random

As a kid, some people dream about being an astronaut or doctor or rock singer, I dreamed about being a supermodel. I think this idea stemmed from my initial aspiration to be a dancer on Solid Gold. Eh, I was young.

But seriously, I wanted to be a supermodel like Cindy Crawford or Claudia Schiffer. I wanted that long, gorgeously curled, fluffed and blown out hair. Clothes dripping from my closet and chairs with diamonds and jewelry all around me. Yeah I was a dreamer. I won’t even go into the dreams of exotic travel, being catered to at my every whim.

I wasn’t in pagaents or out actively trying to pursue this dream (instead thinking it happened like in the movies, where I’m standing at a skee-ball machine at Chuck E Cheese and a guy tells me how gorgeous I am and if I’ve ever modeled), but I have had two wannabe supermodel moments and both were epic FAILs.

Fail #1

In  high school, I worked for Wilson’s Leather and we had to outfit women for a mid-level fashion show downtown. We helped them get dressed, provided looks and brought clothing for them to wear down the runway. It was fun! The organizers even left the runway up after the show so after everyone cleared out, I got up there and did a little walk, pretending I was at NYC Fashion Week and my co-worker cheered me on. But my joy was crushed when the janitor looked at me and said, “you’d never make it.” FAIL.

Fail #2

Once I got contacts and became not so ugly looking, I went to a model scouting in Wisconsin (by the airport, lovely) and was selected to go on to the “next round” meaning that I go to Chicago and actually be presented to scouts from several agencies. Literally, I felt like I was on cloud nine. So my mom and I go to Chicago and I stand in line with all these girls who get to actually walk a runway with lights and backstage and everything and smile and then I remember clearly walking down the runway, feeling like hot sh*t and then a guy looking at me, looking down at a profile picture he had in front of him and crossing my name off his list. C-R-U-S-H-E-D. And when no one wanted to meet with me after that point, I was released to go home to Wisconsin. And then the next day my car died when I tried to drive back to Minneapolis. The dream pretty much died there. FAIL.

Now I watch my Project Runway and Beautiful Life (pre-cancellation) and ANTM and realize, I’m not model material, but in my own head and safety of my private apartment, I am a little supermodel, with hips, petite frame and a little weight on her.

And I’m smizing the sh*t out of my walk.

So if you could be a supermodel, what you would you like to model? Or what is your secret profession dream? Since I’ve had two supermodel FAILs, it might be time to look into my fallback: secret agent a la Angelina Jolie.

Review blog update: I know, I’ve been slacking on this, but a new review of Neutrogena Healthy Skin Enhancer is up. It’s my foundation-alternative (especially when it’s hot outside)

21 Comments

  1. Kendra says:

    Yeah, I wanted to be a supermodel like Cindy Crawford (we had matching moles!) but I am 5’2 and when I went to a scout thing I was told I was cute but to short. My hopes and dreams were crushed.

  2. Erin says:

    I totally dreamed that someone would “discover” me for modeling or acting or singing, too! Too bad I’m not good at any of those things!

  3. Allison says:

    Um yeah, I knew I would never be a supermodel, not with this 5’6″ frame and oversized calves.

    But my mom always told me I was pretty, does that count?

  4. katelin says:

    man i used to think being a model would be so fun, and i still kind of do when i watch top model and the photo shoots they do. then i realize that i probably wouldn’t be able to take it seriously and would end up laughing on set a lot. oh well.

  5. Lil' Woman says:

    I remember when i was about 10-11 i made my mom take me to one of the casting calls at a local hotel and i was sooo supped for it…they picked my sister and not me and i hated her for the longest time…little did the bitch know it was all just one of those scam deals.

  6. Melissa says:

    I used to love the idea of modeling, too.. until I grew up and realized that I wasn’t quite model material. Bummer! At least you were gutsy enough to go to the casting call! I think you should’ve made it :)

  7. Megkathleen says:

    I would’ve loved to be a supermodel too – just for the free clothes!

  8. mandy says:

    I think it rocks that you went to a modeling call. I’ve never done anything like that and can’t say that I ever really wanted to.

  9. Bing says:

    Yeah, I feel you on that one. I wanted to be a model growing up. I was tall and thought I had a shot – but no one ever came calling and I never tried to meet with people to actually do anything about it.

    I also wanted to be a rock star – can’t sing, a gymnast – way too tall and uncoordinated, ice skater – never skated.

    Such is life…

  10. Maxie says:

    OMG in middle school I really really wanted to be a model. I randomly emailed Paul Frank Clothing Company one day and asked them if I could come pose for pictures. Fail.

  11. Paula says:

    I would have loved to have been an actress. I don’t think I was AWFUL at acting, I loved drama in school. But I can’t be uninhibited enough unfortunately.

  12. Kara says:

    Rock Star all the way. Growing up, I knew every word to every song on the radio and I never hesitated to belt them out. It wasn’t until I was much older that people started to point out to me that I actually didn’t have a great voice. Boo to them and your janitor!

  13. Kyla Roma says:

    That’s so cool that you got to try it when you were younger! I was & am definitely not model material, but it’s fun to be on stage here and there…

    …okay maybe I have more fun backstage calling all the shots, but that’s just the control freak in me lol

  14. jen says:

    good for you for trying!!! that’s awesome you made it to a second round! i’m impressed. my secret dreams are dolphin trainer and children’s book author & illustrator. sigh. neither will ever happen.

    side note – i have been saying fail like it’s no one’s business and i couldnt figure out where i picked that up and it was from you! sorry but i stole it…

  15. SoMi's Nilsa says:

    I think my only secret dreams are to be thinner than I am. But, that’s totally achievable and rests completely on my shoulders. Model? Rock Star? Rocket Scientist? Nah, never wanted to be any of them.

  16. phampants says:

    I was a geek model. By that I mean that Beauty & the Geek used my audition so people can laugh at me.

  17. Heidi Renée says:

    When we were little, the local photo studio put me and my sister’s portraits on the wall as an example of their best work. Our grandparents became convinced that we were going to become child models (I wanted to be an artist). Neither of those careers panned out. These days I secretly aspire to have a blog popular enough for companies to give me things to have contests with.

  18. I’d model for victoria’s secret. I’ve totally got the boobs for that.

  19. jenn says:

    secret dream profession: dancer or singer. in my own mind – i’d make a perfect contestant on so you think you can dance :) in reality…not so much!

  20. wilson’s leather eh? did you wear a fringe vest? ; )

  21. eemusings says:

    Secret dream: totally a rock star. Or JK Rowling. Either would do nicely.

 

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