So you all know that three weeks ago I went to the doctor and found out that I need to get back on the healthy living train. Well, this weekend I went back to the doctor for more tests and I was actually looking forward to the dreaded weigh in, because I was DYING to see if all my recent hard work was paying off.
I wasn’t expecting a major weight change, but something. One pound, maybe two, just a little something to validate my hard work.
So I walk in, take the shoes and sweatshirt off (in case lead bricks magically were in them) and I step on the scale, almost anxious to see the result.
And then I did.
No change in weight, in fact, I gained one pound.
As expected, it took two seconds for me to get upset and start to cry.
One f*cking pound. One motherf*cking pound GAINED.
I wanted to rip the scale’s screen off the wall and break it into a million pieces.
When my doctor came in, wondering why I was visibly upset, I told her that I was disappointed in my weigh-in, that I was taking this very seriously and said that I’m logging my calories, mixing up my gym routine, cutting back on drinking, watching portion control. I felt like that one pound was mocking me and telling me I was going to fail.
Shocked by my reaction, she tried to reassure me, “It’s only been three weeks…don’t take it personally…you’re about to start your cycle, I’m sure it’s water retention…it will take time.”
TIME? I KNOW IT WILL TAKE TIME BUT I WANT SOME KIND OF SIGN NOW.
Losing weight just sucks.
It sucks when you have to cut back, it sucks when you look at food sometimes as the enemy and kill yourself to go to the gym and have nothing to show for it. And retaining water f*cking sucks too.
Sure, I do feel leaner and I think my clothes are fitting better, but when you need some kind of validation and don’t get it, you slide into a shame spiral.
Which is exactly what I did. I left her office sad and rather than crying on the couch (like last time), I drank beer, ate frosting, M&Ms, cupcakes, fries and tater tots.
And no, I didn’t feel better afterward and that gross feeling on top of being exhausted lead to a poor showing at yoga on Sunday when I could barely support my own weight on my T-rex-like arms.
Thus, the vicious cycle continues. So I’m trying to rally back and stay motivated.
Thanksgiving will be a challenge though.
I had a hard time deciding if I should post this or not, but I was so upset and frustrated that I had to get it out there.
So how do you stay motivated when you exercise or try to eat healthy?
Trying to keep yourself motivated to exercise just for the sake of exercising and being healthy is really difficult.
For me, I have to train for something.
I am currently training for a triathlon (I have never been athletic in my life, so this is big)
Knowing that I will have to complete the triathlon keeps me motivated to get into the gym and get my body ready for the challenge.
Just training my body for the sake of my health doesn’t keep me going.
Maybe that will help with your motivation.
Good Luck!
I may be one of the only people who tell you this, but I think you should weigh yourself more.
Walking into your doctors office and not having measured your weight in 3 weeks, you had a lot personally invested in seeing the number.
I measure my progress once a week, at as specific a time as possible. The 1 pound gain you saw could’ve been time of day, time of month, water, a gain of muscle and loss of fat, etc.
Instead of discouraging yourself, find a way to get more accurate results to see if what you’re doing really works or not.
If that makes sense, and you’re interested, look for the “Monday Morning Weigh In” posts on my blog for my close to OCD system for tracking my weight.
Watching the numbers on the scale can be depressing. Throughout the week, my weight jumps up and down by up to 4-5 pounds. It drives me crazy, but there’s nothing I can do about it. I try not to take too much stock in the number on the scale, but instead focus on how my clothes are fitting. I think it’s a better judgment for me.
Ugh, I know how you feel. I was just talking to my sister about this! Sometimes I think my body is broken because my weight fluctuates so much on a daily basis, regardless of whether I’m exercising or eating right. I’ve lost seven pounds since my last time on the scale a couple of days ago, but will probably have gained it all back the next time I weigh myself. Sure, maybe it is water, but all the scale says is a number and I’ll admit it: I care what that number is.
I echo the comments about staying away from the scale. It’s an evil beast.
I SO hear you. I don’t have any solutions but I can commiserate. In fact, I was at the doctor today and almost had a fit when I saw how much weight I gained from last year. I’ve never had to watch my weight before and now all of a sudden it’s like I hit a wall and everything that enters my mouth immediately goes to my hips and thighs. It’s depressing.
Not sure if you have already tried it or would even want to, but I have had a few friends who’ve had great success with Weight Watchers online…I’m thinking about heading that direction myself.
I feel ya – I have a really hard time staying motivated. I’ve found that a food journal really helps me. I find that when I just track calories in my head I cheat and tell myself these pretzels or a fun size candy bar don’t count, but I don’t do that when I write everything down.
To motivate myself to workout I always think I’ll regret it if I don’t go and I never regret going. Or I’ll read workout blogs to remind myself why I workout (I feel better, I’m stronger, clothes fit better). Also, (and this sounds really silly, but it works for me) instead of say I really SHOULD go the gym, I say I really WANT to go to the gym over and over and over again until I start to believe myself.
I’ve been known to cry at the dr. about my weight too and it really did take me a while to start seeing results.
oh trust me i am right there with you in the weight loss dilemma of life and it’s ridiculous. i’m so afraid of all the good food coming my way soon but i really hope i can make it through it by working out, eating healthier and seeing results, eventually. you can do it too! we’ll make it! woo!
I THOUGHT I had lost weight after some pants started to fit again, but I weigh pretty much the same as when they didn’t fit so I wonder if it’s just redistributing itself – mainly to my stomach, which never seems to improve.
Why not to the boobs, I ask you?
Honestly? I try not to weigh myself or think about weight during the holidays. I only end up making myself feel bad. There’s so much to do and rarely enough time to do it that I try not to beat myself up when I don’t go to the gym often enough or I eat a little too much. As long as I don’t go buck wild and as long as I get back into my routine after the first of the year, I’m OK with that.
1. I know how you feel. Trust me.
2. The fact that you are feeling better, clothes are fitting better, looking leaner? That is a very good thing. Maybe even better than the numbers on the scale. Not to say that I take my own advice often becuase I hate the numbers on the scale but lately my clothes are fitting better and that’s rather exciting.
3. Sending you a hug! (and I also would have eaten M&Ms and layed around on the couch.)
I’m going through the same process and it’s incredibly frustrating. Instead of focusing on the lbs, have you thought of taking pictures of yourself (in undies and a sports bra) every couple weeks so that you can see the change in your body. Your weight will fluctuate as you lose fat and gain muscle, but where you’ll really see the difference is in the tone of your arms, abs, mid-section, etc. Best of luck!!
Remember, muscle weighs more.
I agree with Kyla when it comes to incorporating rewards with your exercise routine, little things like that really help.
everyone stumbles on their path to getting healthier, so try not to beat yourself up too hard!
Ugh, I’m so sorry Jessica. This sounds like what I go through with my back pain. After being rear ended one too many times my back is a wreck and I’m always in some kind of pain- and to feel comfortable I have to do yoga & work out & stay on top of it.
And sometimes there is nothing that I want to do less.
Mostly I think that finding ways to build rewards into my routine is really helpful- like if I’m going on a long walk, I listen to podcasts, or I’ll work out, clean up and then read a bunch of a book I’ve been dying to read. And trying to re-work what I think of as progress- maybe progress isn’t just numbers on your scale, but it’s also measurements & hitting your calorie intake goals?
Just don’t be too hard on yourself, miss. You’re doing good work & it’s a process- showing up to do the work is WAY more than most people can muster. You’re doing awesome!
I loathe counting calories more than anything. For me, the more “on track” I try to be- the more I fail. So I just stick to making things uber healthy and low calorie and exercise. Weight management is different for everyone so it’s hard to say- this works for me, it’ll work for you. Take a deep breath and realize you’re doing what you can and that’s the important part.
I echo your sentiments and then some. I’ve been trying to lose weight for 6 months. I had a good first few months and I’ve all but halted since then. It’s why, for most of my life, I’ve n ever cared about the scale and focused more on how I look and how I feel. So long as I’m giving myself thumbs up for those two things, the scale can go fuck itself. I’m serious. So, think about what’s important to you. If it really is a number, maybe doing something like Weight Watchers will help you continue to make healthy choices (with an added dose of accountability to someone other than yourself). And if the scale isn’t the most important thing, I say continue to follow those activities that are important to you. Watch what you eat, but don’t become imprisoned by the system. And so long as you feel you’re heading in the right direction, you likely are. Hang in there.
Having gone through this several times, I can tell you I always gain a pound or two or three before I start losing. You’re gaining muscle, which is why you look leaner. Then, all of a sudden, you drop a few pounds (as long as your sticking to your routine). And your doctor is probably right about being on your period. I always weigh less after it’s over.
It totally sucks, but you’ve got to just push yourself through the first few weeks, and you’ll see your reward. It’s the hardest part of the losing weight/getting healthy effort. Take photos of yourself looking better. And enjoy feeling better when your on a healthy routine. Enjoy the extra energy. Try not to get hung up on the scale but on how you feel.
You can do it, I know you can :)
HI! I went to the gym last night for the first time in…well…I don’t remember. The scale says I’ve gained 6 pounds since the wedding this spring. Could have something to do with the gelato and cheese binge of last week, but it was worth every bite.
Anyway, if you’d ever like a gym buddy, let me know. I keep meaning to take some classes (especially yoga!!) but I don’t like going to them by myself. Could provide motivation for us both?
You can do it hon! I would say make sure you aren’t totally withdrawing everything that you do love eating, cause it just makes you crave it more.
Maybe find a workout buddy and you can motivate each other to go to the gym. And do something fun, like a class. I took zumba, it’s lots of fun, and it’s more like dancing than anything else! Even if I can’t shake my hips like Shakira.
Just remember: muscle weighs more than fat…i’m only saying.
I’d say measure yourself and judge your progress by that not the scale. especially not the scale when you’re pms-ing. if you want some moral support or a cheerleader let me know, If I made it to 40 pounds, you can totally do 10, I promise!
Ugh! I think every girl has been where you are. My BFF trained for and ran a full marathon this fall and lost no weight during the process! She was so frustrated.
It sucks! The only advice I have is focus on developing the healthy habits, just so that it will become routine and not worry about results. Then you’ll be pleasantly surprised when they come! Lame I know…but that’s all I got.
Damn girl, you have to give yourself a break. Think how long it took you to get in bad shape you are now. It’s going to take at least that long to get back in good shape. Three weeks is just not a reasonable time frame to see the kind of results you were hoping for- you’re really just setting yourself up for a big disappointment.
Be kind to yourself.
oh dear – i’ve been there more times than i can count. especially now! i’m training for the 1/2 marathon in chicago next year and have been running for 6 weeks straight. i’ve lost a grand total of 1.5 lbs and often get frustrated.
but the thing is – you have to remember that muscle weighs more than fat, and the scale really isn’t that important. it’s about how you look and feel. if your clothes are fitting better, you are losing inches and that’s way more important than lbs.
hang in there!!
I’m so sorry! That frustrating. I think I’ve said this before on here…
I ALWAYS STAY AWAY FROM THE SCALE!
I truthfully have very little idea what I weigh. I’ve learned to base my health on how I look and feel.
My biggest trick has been to cut any ‘less healthy’ food in half and only eat half of it. I throw the rest away ASAP so I’m not tempted to eat it (cupcakes in the garbage don’t look so tasty). That way, I get to eat snacks (I looove snacks) but I don’t inhale an entire bag. I split it up, throw half away and then start on the half I can eat.
Hang in there and keep up the good work! Always commit to six weeks before you expect change. It’ll happen!!!
Aw, so sorry Jess! I know you want validation now, and I would say you feeling good about how you felt pre-weigh in is great validation!
As for staying motivated, it is always a challenge esp when life picks up, but I try to set weekly goals like – I will go to the gym x amount of times this week. And as for healthy food I actually do crave it after a work out, so I guess that could be my motivation, too.
Hang in there lady! You’re doing awesome!
my wedding and being a fabulous bride!
sadly, i’m not motivated enough to get a gym membership so now that its winter, the excersize might be halted…
You can do what I do: EAT YOUR SORROWS! Oh, wait. Shoot. Not what you want. I am the worst at this, but I soooo sympathize. I don’t even weigh in anymore; makes me want to hurt myself.
Totally unacceptable.
Buy and scale and use it daily. Why you “gained” a pound in the past 3 weeks should not be a mystery to you. I’d be just as upset if the same happened to me and I had no idea why. The fact of the matter (as the ladies before me so graciously point out) is that you have no idea if a) you’ve actually lost weight and are now converting to muscle which might bump the number a bit higher, b) if you’ve lost weight and are just retaining water, like your MD mentioned, c) if you’ve actually gained weight, or d) anything in between.
This shouldn’t be some mystical unknown. Weigh-ins should not be scary or surprising. Get in the act of knowing your number, owning it, and figuring out why it is what it is. Maybe it’s lower because of that extra mile you ran yesterday, maybe it’s higher because it’s that time of the month, or maybe it really is all those damn-so-delicious gummy bears. At least you’ll know. There is absolutely no reason nor excuse not to know your weight to the lb and take control of it and your health.
Sometimes getting toned involves gaining some weight. I never weigh myself. It gets me very upset and frustrated. I motivate myself to stay healthy by how great I feel after going to the gym or eating a healthy meal.
First: MUSCLE WEIGHS MORE THAN FAT! MUSCLE WEIGHS MORE THAN FATTTT!
Second: Scales are the devil. Go by how you feel, how your clothes are fitting.
Third: Losing weight DOES suck. But you’ll get there.
First of all, you can do it – you ARE doing it! You are doing a fantastic job!
My advice is to look at the changes you are making as a life change. If you are anything like me, you aren’t interested in living a life that contains no burritos. What’s the point? So here are my basic rules:
1. Calories in is what matters. I honestly don’t think it matters what you eat, but instead what your calorie total is at the end of the day. That means you can eat a cupcake should a cupcake cross your path with NO GUILT WHATSOEVER. (Eliminating guilt and bad feelings is really key.)
2. Any exercise at all = success! You win! You are fantastic, living a balanced and healthy life! You are awesome! (I cheer myself on even if all I managed is 15 minutes of yoga.)
I guess what I’m really saying is that it’s about attitude. Don’t make these changes a punishment that’s tied to guilt. You can and will achieve your goals – it might take time, but you are rocking it, girl! Keep it up!
When I was trying to drop some weight in the spring I had the SAME issue! One week I somehow gained 6 pounds and it wouldn’t come off. I was beyond devastated because I had been working out 6 days a week and counting calories. I swore off the scale and just continued to stick with it and all the sudden the weight started coming off. So, stick with it, you will get there!!
I also need to get back on track because I’ve been eating sooo badly and drinking a lot lately because of all of my vacations and the holiday season coming up!!!
It will get better! Please don’t base your progress on the scale. When I was trying to lose weight I took before and after pictures every month. Sometimes I even posted them online to get feedback from people who might see the photos more objectively than me. And, yes, I took them while wearing my swimsuit. I found that the photos told me my progress much better than the scale ever did.
I’m going to give you a swift kick in the butt because if you feel leaner and stronger and your clothes are fitting better then you’re doing something RIGHT!!! I never weigh myself because it is completely deceiving. Women’s weight can fluctuate up to 10 pounds either way because of water retention and all the stupid hormonal crap. The number on the scale doesn’t mean a whole lot. You are working really, really hard and if you are feeling better then keep at it. I know it must have been frustrating to see that 1 pound, but forget about it. (Easier said than done, I guess…)
I have been trying to eat a lot healthier but still have slip ups. I just keep reminding myself that the weight didnt go on overnight and it wont come off overnight as much as I would like it to.
I definitely have motivation problems when it comes to being healthy..and honestly I have not ever found a way to solve this little problem which is why I am pleasantly plump.
Also, the T-Rex arm comment was hilarious.
Interesting time to ask. I just worked out alongside Jason for the first time tonight (I know I’ve been doing mornings but we timed it so I could watch SYTYCD, the one thing I legit miss about TV). I am red and sweaty and I figure if I can get over him seeing my like this, we can do it together. Because we eat A LOT together. And I’ve gained a solid 12 pounds since we’ve been dating. 12 pounds I lost as we were thinking about dating. And then I made and ate fudge and cream cheese stuffed peppers. And ate stray pie. And the weight isn’t exactly falling off but the working out is definitely making me feel better. I lost my point in there somewhere.