Last week I read an interesting New York Times article and a similar post on Doni’s blog about your brain on computers, aka information overload.
It was scary how much I can relate to this. And how easily I feel myself burn out sometimes.
I’m online pretty much all day. Two years ago, I wasn’t on Facebook or Twitter and now, I can’t imagine how my brain functioned without them. I clutch my Blackberry, eager to see any new tweets or check-ins or Facebook status messages whenever my brain needs to be fed, which is pretty much every few minutes.
But the overstimulation of my brain online, constantly checking, searching and being notified of new DMs, @ replies and emails makes me feel like I’m part of a Pavlovian experiment. Ding! What? What am I missing??
Whenever I go out to eat, ride the bus or experience a lull in conversation, my friends and I are always checking our phones. I only have one friend who doesn’t do that and she’s nice and doesn’t say anything when I unconsciously reach for mine at dinner. I’m a little embarrassed by that.
The Times article talks about how this addiction can weigh on people around you too because you’re not present, part of you is always somewhere else. This is also true.
When I was in Nola, my Blackberry was a tool for maps, and I barely checked Twitter and Facebook. It felt weird…but kind of soothing. I was more relaxed and enjoyed what was around me rather than be distracted.
I need that kind of balance in my life more. I don’t need to be frantically searching for video to watch or stalking my friend’s adorable baby pictures. I need to GET WORK DONE and NOT die when crossing the street.
I’ve been so distracted by my Blackberry that I’ve nearly been hit by a car, twice. That’s really not that uncommon according to friends, but rather than look down at a screen, I need to look up at what’s in front of me.
I’ve felt this way about my love of photography too. I love taking photos and capturing memories but I need to find that balance between living through the lens and living my life. I need to soak in those moments that won’t be forgotten, even if it’s not on film.
So that’s what I’m thinking about today. I don’t think this will be an immediate change but something gradual. And I’m wondering if you also overload on available online content or if you’re even addicted to your Blackberry or iPhone? Are you guilty of behaving badly with it out in public with friends or family?
I have a bit of online/tech addiction. I get woken up by my Chumby which I can also check my e-mail on then I grab my phone and check what happen overnight on twitter. Then I turn on my pandora while I take a shower. I get out of the shower and watch the news and respond to e-mails that I can’t respond to on my phone b/c it would take too long or there are images I want to see. On my way to work I might do quick respones to e-mails or texts via voice to text.
Since I don’t have access to personal e-mail on my work computer I check my e-mail constantly on my phone. Same with facebook since its blocked.
When I go to bed I watch whats streaming on my Chumby and check my e-mail and sometimes uses pandora on my Chumby to go to bed.
Rinse and repeat.
I am so right there. I’m currently planning out a way to significantly de-stress my online life. It can be overwhelming. There is no break. People can reach you (and EXPECT to be able to reach you) 24/7.
I totally hear you. I gave up my phone during meals during lent. It doesn’t seem that hard. But it really was! I tried to continue after lent..but no such luck. I just have to check it. And the camera thing is such a valid point too! Sometimes I am more worried about taking pictures than enjoying the moment. But at that same time, sometimes life happens so fast, it is so wonderful to have the pictures to relive the memories.
I don’t have a BB or iphone, so I think I’m ok on that sense and I could see getting one being a BAD idea because when I’m home I feel like I spend too much time on my laptop. I am trying to restrict the times I’m online and not checking my email/twitter every time I walk by my computer.
I can do it when there are no computers around and when I’m traveling but at home it is bad!
It is hard to live within our present selves when there is so much going on around us. It can be difficult to find a balance. At some point in my life, I made a deal with myself when I decided to divulge into owning my first Blackberry. I told myself that during [list of situations] you are not allowed to use your phone. Other times, feel free. It’s worked really well for me. Some of the things on that list include, when I’m at a restaurant or coffee with a friend or friends. When my husband is talking to me. When I’m at the dog park, etc. The rules I set for myself are easy to follow because I created them. :)
I’m not too obsessed with my phone. I check my e-mail and g-chats on a fairly regular basis, but it’s no biggie for me to leave me phone at home when I go somewhere. I turn it off every night. If I’m out with friends, I may check it from time to time, but on a date night it stays in my purse. T is really bad about his iphone. He is seriously obsessed with it and has a meltdown if it’s not near him at all times.
You’re not the only one. I heard from a reliable source (People Mag! haha) that Madonna slept with her blackberry under her pillow and THAT’S why she and Guy Ritchie got divorced. Blackberries ruin relationships!
Of course, I’m still on mine like it’s attached to my arm every day.
Oh yes, I am TOTALLY addicted to my iPhone and Facebook in particular. I’m actually really looking forward to being in Japan, because my phone will be off for ten whole days and I’ll have no real connection to “real life”. I need a break from it all!
I would really recommend trying small fasts where you go without technology- cook a great meal, read a book and then have a bubble bath for an evening! Now and then pulling back can help to curb that compulsive feeling. I get it too – especially when I’m bored at work – but I always try to ask “what is my end goal here, and what is this going to get me?” at the end of the day I feel like checking my e-mail or twitter or facebook can be a little like an OCD tick, and I don’t want to encourage that!
I worked in a clinic waiting room and I was always amazed at how rude people were with cell phones etc and complaining about not getting enough human contact as they sit distracted playing on their phones. Internet is introducing a whole new form of social etiquette
Guilty as charged! I’m so in love with my blackberry and so much so that I can’t live without it. However, a little while ago, my daughter said, “Mommy, you love your phone more than you love me…” That was definitely a wake-up call/slap on my face moment.
So now, I try not to use or be on it when my girls are around – it’s really embarassing when your own daughter thinks about me that I love my BB more than my own kids.
It takes practice, but you really need to keep remindng yourself before you really hurt someone or someone’s feelings. Good luck girlfriend!
xoxo
Um I am SO guilty of this. And it’s gotten even worse lately, as I find myself getting more and more annoyed/aggravated with people that I follow on Twitter. While I’ve met some totally awesome people on Twitter (you, duh), I also have ended up following some people that drive me absolutely freaking batty.
The other day I was like seriously? why the hell am I going to the internet for aggravation? Don’t I get enough of that from people I know in real life?
So just last night I actually went through and did a blog/Twitter cleanse. No more reading blogs that annoy me. No more following people who only bitch. I just don’t have room in my life for it.
But honestly, if it’s not Twitter, it’s e-mail. And if it wasn’t e-mail, I’d be texting. Or on the AP Mobile app reading the news. I’m just addicted in general.
Love the post!
Eh, I haven’t been addicted to much. I check my email a few times a day, much less than before. Facebook is once every few days, maybe once a week sometimes. Its one of the reasons I got a cheap phone for just texting and calling. Its actually kinda nice. I enjoy the world around me more this way.
I can’t remember where, but I read something similar awhile ago. I will sometimes think “I need to be present more” so I’ll make myself put my phone away.
I have to admit that having switching to a smart-phone at the end of last year made me much more addicted. Knowing I can connect online, at any time, makes me feel like I need to be available at all time for either work/play.
That said, I do enjoy having multiple channels to connect and I don’t mind sharing/updating the world from my phone. However, I admit I too need to work on being totally there when I’m hanging out in person. I have a bad habit of keeping my cell out on the dinner table and safe under my pillow. While I don’t mind when others do that, some of my friends do.
I just want to give props to CityGal for going a whole month without logging onto Facebook. WOW! Maybe there is hope for us online junkies.
I will say that I’m addicted to the ‘Net … it’s like I don’t want to miss anything!
But I don’t feel this way about my cell phone. I have one and rarely turn it on. When the phone rings at home, I check the call display to see who it is before I answer. It drives me crazy that so many people are attached to their cell phones.
Omg – guilty as charged. I once fell down the stairs and sprained my foot because I was looking at my blackberry. You’d think that would be a wake-up call but it wasn’t! Ridiculous!
When I was in Europe for three weeks I didn’t have my phone and even though I went on the computer every second day or so I felt so free from it all! The first week or two after I got back I barely ever checked Twitter even and kind of “forgot about it” haha. But now I am full-on addicted again. I guess I just need another vacay! Lol
I am addicted… i left my BlackBerry at home one day going to work and even though I was online/on gchat all day, I was so lost w/o my BB! lol
in no way did my iphone help my internet addiction but man i can’t imagine NOT having it now. and yeah i fully accept my addiction and try to balance it out sometimes by not going online when i get home but that doesn’t happen so often. but at least i try.
I actually saw a similar story on this on CNN when I was sitting in the airport on Sunday waiting to board my flight, while I was scrolling around on my blackberry.
My blackberry may as well be physically attached to me because if I don’t have it near me at all times, I try to hurry up and finish whatever I’m doing that’s causing me to be away from my phone so I can have it in my grasp again. Now, I don’t feel this way when I’m at work (I’m actually a tad grateful that I have no need to check it every 20 minutes).
Things with my computer situation have gotten worse ever since I got my macbook. Don’t get me wrong, my macbook is a thing of beauty and wonder but the convenience of being able to have it in my bed has strongly impeded on my book reading and all out productivity. It was much simpler when I only had a desktop which is set up in another room. So now on my days off, I’m usually connected from the moment I wake up to the time I go to bed. which is so not a good thing.
I definitely think there’s a boundary that needs to be drawn with this web stuff. Like you, I’m seriously only the computer for 9 hours a day. And a year ago, I would’ve come home and been on the computer some more. But these days I am SO SICK of being at the computer that I don’t even turn mine on at home anymore unless it’s the weekend. And I don’t have a crackberry, er, blackberry, so I don’t miss tweets and DMs. My friends know that if they have to get ahold of me, it’s best to text me first.
Recently, I went on a media fast because I felt like I was too connected to the Internet and my phone. It was taking me away from living life and being present in the moment. At first, it felt so weird. I wasn’t used to not checking my phone every 2.5 seconds and not knowing what was happening in the blog/Twitter world.
Since then, I’ve gotten a LITTLE better at not having to be connected to the online world, but I can see myself falling back into old habits. I’m trying to stay more disconnected than I usually am on the weekends and use that time more effectively.
It’s weird because I didn’t have a cell phone until I was 16. I didn’t have high-speed Internet until I was in college. And I just got a smartphone in May! So it’s not something I’ve grown up with at all, but it’s how our culture is evolving so I’ve fallen into this pattern.
I spend all day on a computer and a couple hours at night, too, so I definitely overload. It’s the whole reason I haven’t bought a handheld with Web capabilities — I would be out of control.
it is tough but it’s part of life these days. as long as you don’t forget to stop and smell the roses rather than take a picture of them, you’re good :)
Unfortunately, I’m quite addicted to my iPhone. One of my favorite things about vacation is going off the radar. I’ve been trying to do that more often lately, but it’s definitely a challenge.
There are times when I feel a huge disconnect between myself and people in their 20s. It’s nothing to do with maturity (some of my very good friends are still in their 20s). It has everything to do with technology. I didn’t have a cell phone or even easily accessible email/internet access when I was in college. People in their 20s all had cell phones and email and internet throughout their collegiate years. It plays a huge difference in how we carry ourselves as adults. I find it rude and offensive and really downright annoying when people I’m with cannot get their faces out of their phones. For that reason, I really don’t socialize with the 20-something crowd in large groups. That Times article was spot-on when it says people who are that connected to their phones aren’t present. As an outsider, I can feel it. So, instead of hating on a group where clearly I’m in the minority, I just avoid it. Oh and I also love my unplugged weekends, like this coming weekend when we’ll be off the grid and without cell phones. I feel more me when I cannot be reached.
None of the people I hang out with on a regular basis are constantly on their phones. But I recently had an out-of-town friend visit for a weekend and she was ALWAYS on her Blackberry. It was a little shocking since I don’t usually encounter that. My phone spends 90% of its time in my purse.
Of course, I’m rarely busy at work so I have all day to stay caught up on Facebook and blogs. And I don’t use Twitter so that’s one less thing to worry about.
I suggest turning off the sound alerts on your phone if possible. It really helps with that whole Pavlovian response to the *ding*.
I have held out on getting an iPhone for exactly this reason. I feel like I’m tied to technology for most of the day and there’s probably something to be said for not having access to the Internet at all times. Still, I think I may have to take the plunge soon. It would make a lot of things easier.
I realize that we are in the age where the use of technology is unavoidable. However, my BIGGEST pet peeve is when people use their phones at the dinner table. If you get a call or an email, casually excuse yourself from the table to take it. Talking/texting at the table is so rude!
I’m addicted, but I think that might be why I stopped blogging (I know terrible thing to say on a blog, right?!) but I wanted to just live my life and not document it for a while.
That said your post is timely to me because: yesterday I got to work, reached in my bag and realized both my Blackberry and my cell phone were…at home. I felt weird all day. Three years ago I went to Ireland and my cell phone didn’t work there, and I didn’t have access to a computer really and I noticed that, for a week anyway, I didn’t really miss it…interesting.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. I was on vacation/visiting family in Kentucky and Tennessee for the past week and had such a hard time NOT checking my blackberry every hour or so. Since then I’ve been more conscious about it and spending more time away from the internet. It can’t be healthy to be connected at all time, and it usually feels good to get away for a while and just Be.
I am the same way! My netbook and iphone must be within arms reach of me at all times or I start freaking out. I can’t go a day without checking my email, facebook, twitter, and RSS reader. I wish I could “Unplug” but I am just not one of those people :(
I am struggling with this a lot lately so thank you for this post. I recently got my first BlackBerry and I was tweeting and checking facebook throughout the day while at work and it was taking away from my work which isn’t smart at all. I decided to delete my twitter account a few weeks ago and I feel better with that. I usually only check facebook once a day now. I really need to work though on staying off my laptop at night reading all the blogs! I love it but I literally spend all night on it and that’s not good. My goal is to unplug after an hour and that will be a challenge. I would also like to leave Sunday’s free of the computer if possible and all of the “social networks”.
I think I have it bad too. It’s a habit just carrying my iPhone in my hands at all times. If I don’t then I feel lost or something is missing….like losing my keys. I have a habit of checking my iPhone even if I just checked it seconds ago and “forgot” that I did. With the deaf community, we’ve been finding it offensive if we check our phones when we’re with each other especially in the middle of a conversation or at lunch/dinner.
I will admit to having an intense need to be plugged in all the time several months ago and then I stopped for a week — blogging, tweeting, facebooking, etc. I found that I liked it. I read more. I reached for the phone to call people instead of texting or reaching out to them on facebook. I was more present. Since that time, I’ve worked really hard to find a balance. I disconnect a lot on weekends. I don’t have a smartphone. I leave my phone in the car or my bag when I’m with friends. And surprisingly, life goes on just fine.
I generally only check Facebook once or twice a week, and I can go for days at a time without tweeting, even though I sit at my desk at home all day. I usually can’t resist making the rounds in my reader, though. On the weekend, I do sometimes disconnect. I don’t have a smart phone, so it’s just a matter of leaving the computer off. I wanted a Blackberry pretty bad last year, but now I’m happy with my little freebie flip phone.
This is what I find interesting…I do not have a Smartphone for home or work, and this means I can’t tweet or check FB during the day, and therefore I feel behind all the time with my online friends.
It’s really hard to only have a night to catch up on what’s been happening all day. I constantly struggle with myself over this too because I enjoy my downtime and offline time, but it’d be nice to be able to keep up with my online life, too.
The addiction I have for my blackberry and moreso its messenger feature is nearly comical but probably more pathetic. I have my phone within reach almost all the time. If I separate myself I am always wondering if someone bbm’d me. Its like a drug. I can’t imagine not having it. I should probably take a 24 hour break and detox. Do they have a version of AA for blackberry users?
Some days my work day is slow so I check twitter more often (rarely on facebook though I just added the FB app for my blackberry…). There are days, like this past weekend, where I ignore my phone, emails, twitters and etc and it’s just so LOVELY. I’m learning to balance the two better but yes, I’ve had issues with this before. It’s tough to find the happy medium but I’m learning that when I’m with less tech-y friends, my phone stays in my purse unless it’s a phone call. When I’m out with my family, I use the phone only if I need to “escape,” for a few minutes. And when I’m on vacation? Well, I pretend my phone doesn’t exist in all ways/shapes/forms!
It’s definitely a work in progress but it feels good to have started it.
I have a BB and I was addicted to it for awhile. Always checking emails, twitter and FB. I knew I was addicted. I hated it, but couldn’t put it down. I’m online all day as well, thanks to a desk job. To be honest- I came home after work and would spend the remainder of my night finishing whatever online that I didn’t cover at work.
annnnnd then I deleted internet from my BB. (gasp!) I know. I should back up and say I spent various wknds “tech free” before taking the net off my phone plan (which was also due to cost). I wouldn’t open my laptop and I would leave my phone on silent. Taking those wknds was amazing. Refeshing. I haven’t had internet on my phone since December and I don’t miss it at all.
Try it!
I don’t have a smartphone, so that definitely helps. I’m still online all day for work, and often at home too, though
I am the same way. I recently got a blackberry and I’m even more addicted to the Internet than I’ve ever been. I only have one friend who doesn’t have a facebook. And sometimes, I want to be her. I did manage to not log-onto FB for an entire month. But that was only because an ex was stalking me. Ugh…times were so much simpler when my biggest worry was if I would ever get a cordless phone in my bedroom ;)
As bad as I have Internet withdrawal, I also love being in the company of others or not being connected. The balance is trying to find the balance of each.