14 May 2012

Balancing the life trifecta

By: Jessica B.
Tagged: Random

While catching up with Nic last week, I explained my crazy concept of the “life trifecta” and how mine is slowly getting back in balance.

The life trifecta are the three things that keep you sane and stable in your life.

Mine are: Work, friends/family and apartment

These are the things that keep me grounded, balanced and feeling like I’m in control of my life on a manageable basis.

When drama or issues arise in one quad (e.g. moving, being disinvited to a wedding/bachelorette party or work stress), I can handle it because the other two quads are stable. I am then able to manage the disrupted quad and balance resumes.

The shit starts to hit the fan if TWO quads have drama/issues. That’s when the delicate balance is thrown off, and a feeling of sadness or depression can sit in. One quad cannot sustain the stress/drama of the others on its own. If this happens, I start to emotionally shut down and try to get through it to slowly regain the balance.

Now let’s make the trifecta a quad and add a boy in to the mix. I’ve found that the joy of a crush or “new boy” can balance out immediately any other stresses in my previous trifecta, because I’m so distracted by how much I like him. Sure, the other quad imbalances seep in to the all power boy crush quad but, overall, a text, smile or night out with a guy can restore the balance. Making out sure helps too.

But if/when the boy quad falls in to issues or drama, the joy goes away and trifecta that merged in to a square is shot to hell again and it takes time to re-establish the previous balance. Fortunately when my square got smashed, the friend/family quad was so strong and supportive, it made the re-adjustment easier.

You may think I’m totally crazy after reading this, but this is how I logistically explain my life balance.

And right now, I have a big disruption in one quad with a few blips in another. Clearly, the 3am phone in my brain is ready to ring saying, “Chicago, we have a problem.”

How do you handle stress?


  1. eemusings says:

    THIS. You totally hit the nail on the head.

  2. Elizabeth says:

    I like the idea of the trifecta–it’s a great way to highlight the positives without allowing all the other areas to fall apart. I haven’t been the most amazing at handling stress lately, but long rambly talks usually help.

  3. katelin says:

    dude i totally see the logic in this and i think i’m the same way. i can only handle a stressed work day if other parts of my life are okay. i don’t think we’re allowed to be stressed in every part of our life, it just wouldn’t be fair, ha.

  4. RebeccaC says:

    Dude whats going on lately? Hope you’re hanging in there. Thinking of you!

  5. Hmm. The trifecta. That’s a really good theory. I like that…

    As far as stress goes, I am hardly the person to ask. My one leg of my trifecta is all effed up. I hate my job and I can’t seem to find a new one that fits my schedule. I guess I’m just clinging to the other two legs…pouring myself into CB and Walker and into school. I guess that helps a bit, but I’m real focused on getting the other leg right. Good luck with the stress…and if you come up with anything please let me know!

  6. Marjolein says:

    This makes absolute sense. It explains why I’m feeling stressed with the move coming up and my job not really having a future any more.. it’s a great way of explaining to people how the balance is lost.

  7. S. says:

    I understand you completely. Especially the boy crush part.

  8. Nic says:

    Holla at yo boo…

    I don’t know. It’s the first thing that came to me.

    Stay fancy.