One of the hard parts about dating in your 30s is putting yourself out there. And dating in Chicago in your 30s isn’t easy. It requires a constant effort of going out, checking out profiles, looking at singles or matchmaking events (that don’t cost $500) and just…seeing what happens.
And while I’m not actively, obsessively looking, I’m open. And then a guy came around, who on paper was like, a yes. We were the same age, had similar interests, we were looking for the same things, and he wasn’t damaged from past relationships.
First date went fine but where this guy really was a cut above was texting. He knew the right things to say when (I should note, they were genuine too), like “I should have kissed you on our first date” or “what would make me happy is a picture of your smiling face” or my favorite, “I get you’re busy, but I’ll wait for us to have dinner again, it’ll be worth it.”
OMFG WHO SAYS THAT? I’M LITERALLY SWOONING AT MY DESK AND IM’ING MY COLLEAGUE THAT I CANNOT BELIEVE WHAT I’M READING.
Now, you could say, wow, you are starved for romance. And maybe you would be right, but really I think I’m just starved for a guy who knows what he wants, is confident in what he says (and means it) and isn’t going to put his dick in “one and done” women to figure out that free p*ssy is more fun. Cough, that happened.
So yeah, giving good text is hot. But that doesn’t mean it always lives up to in person. Sadly, this Robin Thicke of text went that way on date #2.
So what did I learn:
- Gotta keep trying, this was encouraging but not the right one
- Not so dead inside after all (yay!)
- If I let you kiss me to “just get it over with,” that’s bad
- Asking me multiple times throughout the date if we are going to kiss = not hot. At all
Back to the drawing board.