06 July 2014

The appointment where I got not so great news

By: Jessica B.
Tagged: Random

So here’s how Thursday at 10:45am CT went:

Doctor: “You have a stress fracture. It’s right here [points to a bright white line on my MRI].”

Me: [Silence]

Doctor: “I don’t know when it happened, but it’s likely that it was your injury back in May.” [the one where I continued to run after, including that 10 mile race]

Me: “But I don’t have bone pain, I have muscle pain. And that pain has been better lately.”

Doctor: “Your muscles are likely compensating for the fracture, to protect it. It’s not like a normal fracture where the pain gets worse until you can’t walk.”

Me: “So…..now what?”

Doctor: “We will give you a boot to help the leg rest and start the six-week healing process now. No weight-bearing exercise, so only swimming and biking, but if biking hurts you have to stop.”

Me: [Silence]

And thus, I left with a new accessory and with a general dazed/stunned look on my face.

The thing is, I know it could be worse. I could have a full break, or be bed ridden, need crutches, or need surgery. But that doesn’t give me a TON of comfort just yet.

I just can’t…fucking believe it.

It is just setback, but sometimes, the dark part of my mind wanders and feels like…it’s just not fucking fair. I have friends who are FAR LESS active than me and they can just walk outside and run 5 miles like it’s no big deal. And I train and take care of myself and this happens. Why can’t this just happen for me???? And then I want to quit and say fuck it.

But, to keep that dark part of my mind at bay, I’m focusing on what I can do for now. It is only six weeks, maybe a little more. It’s not a full break, and it could be so much worse. This sucks. But it’s not the end. It’s just…another set back.

So Thursday night I cried, watched some of my favorite movies, listened to emo music and wallowed in a pool of self pity. And then Friday I got up and started to practice doing my daily stuff with the walking brace. Looks easy but trust me, it’s exhausting.

And the countdown to July 25 for a three-week check in is on. And I will be checking out the water workouts at my gym in the meantime. This should be hilarious.

Sigh.

 

 

 

4 Comments

  1. Karen says:

    Jessica-

    This sucks. Don’t give up. I am lurker, but I read your blog on occasion. I messed up my right foot in October of last year. I am not sure if I had a stress fracture or a nerve injury- the 4 doctors I have been to cannot agree, but my foot has been swollen since October. I wore a boot, I wear a compression sock, and if I don’t wear the compression sock, it swells up again. I had a friend who had a stress fracture last year and it took her 1 year to fully recover. I am just telling you a real time because everyone who has been injured that I talk to all say the doctors say 6 weeks or something but often it takes much longer to heal.

    Don’t give up. Start swimming now. I never liked swimming but this forced me to swim. This video (link below) helped me a lot.

    I would give yourself a month of trying to swim laps, and then you might get good enough so that you start liking it. That is what happened to me.

    Hang in there.

    http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000FDK78W/ref=oh_details_o03_s00_i02?ie=UTF8&psc=1
    Freestyle: Made Easy (2004)Terry Laughlin

  2. Arielle says:

    Uch! So sorry to hear that, that’s so frustrating and I know how hard you’ve been training. Running is brutal on your body like that. Try to keep the positive energy going and focus on getting better and hopefully you’ll be back at it before you know it. Feel better!

  3. Jenny lustig says:

    I think you have to focus on what you can do vs. what you can’t. Swimming and biking are perfect compliments to running (a big reason why triathlons exist) and can help you keep in great shape while your stress fracture is healing. If you focus on those things and eating a healthy diet you may even be in better shape than those who are just running to prep for the marathon. So I know it’s hard to deal with but I think you have to look at this as a change in your training regiment instead of a setback (mind over matter). I have faith in you Jess!!

  4. Aww what a bummer. Injuries are so frustrating as they slow us down and make us feel like we aren’t the whole person we’re used to being. I really hope you can keep positive and who knows, maybe it’s happened for a reason (that old chestnut). Big hugs x

 

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